Power of Positivity

Anyone that knew my Paw-Paw, Dovard (Lucky) Counselman, would easily say that he was one of the most, if not the most, positive person they had ever met. He was born in 1921, went through the depression, was in the air force, married almost 70 years, had over 20 heart surgeries, had a son that fought drug addiction, yet you would have thought everything in his life was perfect. It was actually quite annoying at times:)

He traveled many places to give speeches on the power of positive thinking. He was convinced that if he thought and believed he could make a hole in one of the golf course, he actually could. I believe he had 6 hole in ones in his life, with the last being when he was 87. He was an amazing example of how the way we think influences our actions, which therefore influences who we are and how we live.

Romans 12:2 says, "Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect." Phillipians 4:8 says, "Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things."

These are just two verses that show just how powerful our mind can be. What we think about has a direct influence on how we live.

We live in a time where everything is problem focused. I hear people constantly talking about how bad our world is, how awful their job is, how terrible their child is, and the list goes on and on. I also believe that many of our conversations with our friends or acquaintances are problem-focused. People normally "vent" to others about negative events that are occuring in their life. I am convinced that if we could concentrate half as much on the positive parts of our lives as we do negative, we would be drastically changed.

At our small group meeting this weekend, we talked about the godly and the ungoldly. We discussed how important it is to have people in our life that not only point out the ungodly parts in our life, but also the godly. How encouraging would it be to have a friend pointing out the godly parts of you?

Positive thinking, setting our minds on Christ and good, pure, honorable things can change our lives!!!! My profession focuses a lot on people's problems- that is why my profession exists; however, the people I see that change the most rapidly are those who choose to look at the exceptions in their life, at the times where they don't want to kill their boss, or at the times they are proud of their children.

I pray that when I have children I notice their positives much more than their negatives. I think parents can sometimes fall into the trap of feeling like their job is to look at what their child is doing "wrong" and get them back on the "right" path. While this is very important, what about all the things they are already doing well? I am a huge believer in positive reinforcement- on your children, friends, spouse, co-workers.

I encourage everyone to use the power of positive thinking and to challenge your thoughts. Notice the good in your life. Tell others about great things they are doing. I know it will make a tremendous difference- I had postive thinking embodied by one of the best men I knew. He always believed he would pass away on the golf course, and he did at the age of 89 just a little over a year ago- Now that's some powerful positive thinking!!!

Here are some pics- Our last father's day together and the 2 love birds enjoying the beach a few months before he passed away...gosh I miss him and crying as I write this...thankful for these tissues in my counseling office- not always used just for clients:)

Mad at God? or Mad at Satan?

When unfortunate things happen to us, we often ask the question, "Why?" or "Why me?" This is a natural response and wondering why things happen to us is not wrong, bad, or even unhealthy. It can become unhealthy when we let it consume us and we question why God would have something less than ideal occur in our lives.

I am currently reading and studying the book of Job and am finding so many amazing truths in this small book. I have read it before and knew the basics of the book, but truly studying it has opened up my heart and mind to many new concepts and ways of thought. Job goes through seemingly every trouble that people come to counseling for- losing loved ones, "anxiety", losing his business, losing all of his money, "depression", suicidal ideation, sickness, and the list goes on and on. Job asked "Why?" about 20 times in the book of Job and God never did answer outright; however, Job trusted in the one who allowed him to suffer and came out victorious. Even though Job never knew why he suffered, he knew who was in control when he suffered, and who wasn't!

In the book of Job, Satan comes before the Lord and God points out his faithful servant, Job. It is then when Satan suggests that Job will abandon his faith that the Lord challenges that and sets out to prove him wrong. There is such a huge significance of Satan appearing before the Lord. This shows us that he (yes, even Satan) is under the divine control of God. He cannot act on his own, but must receive permission from God- wow! As scary as it might be to think that Satan is constantly trying to throw us off, it is also comforting knowing that he is not independent of God's control. In just this first bit of Job, we see that Satan causes bad things to happen to us, but it is God who allows it to happen. The Lord helps us in the midst of our struggle that He allows, in order to deliver us and conquer our enemies- once again proving his sovereignty over the world and the devil!

I am by no means a theologian, but I do feel like asking "Why?" is common for both Christians and non-Christians alike. Robert Bell notes "Satan would have us believe that God is not fair, yet we seldom consider the cruelty of the devil. I have never met anyone bitter about what Satan has done to him, but I have met many who were bitter toward God." WOW!!

It is the devil who is cruel- not God. The same struggles that the devil tries to hurt us with, God desires for us to have the victory. We may never know exactly why hardships come to us the way they do, but we know who is in control and who is on our side.

I encourage you (as well as myself) to be mad at Satan when hardships come, not God. It is God who has your best interest at heart and works everything together for your good; It is Satan to sets out to steal, kill, and destroy. Claim your victory!